Yet another day without you Dad, it is getting harder and harder every passing day. I understand, it happens with everyone and some day you have to be alone and make decisions at your own but I am not been able to accept it. Not getting how to move on, though I am trying every passing day but what to do with this heart which is not ready to accept that you left us.
Not complaining about anything Dad, but I am not a person who believes in destiny, God......
I know it was not to that extreme that you would not have made it and somewhere down the line I do believe that I am responsible for what has happened since I wasn't there and let you go through that hard time by yourself. I never thought that I am talking to you for the very last time that morning!!
I can't even imagine what you have been through during that time knowing that none of your kid is there with you. I see it every night, things your friends told me during your last times and I guess I will never forgive myself to leave you alone in that pain. I never had this realization that I will never see you again, Dad. There was a lot I wanted to share and wanted you to guide your son through his life but here I am, all alone, thinking about you every single day.
I kept moving in life thinking about a day we all will stay together. Dad, how to tell you, I see you with open eyes, still feel you are there at home and will hug you again someday while coming back home.
Initially it's Dadu, then You and it will be Me at some stage in life, I do not complaint about it but it wasn't the time Dad.It will keep hurting me entire life that you went through such a pain and I wasn't there for you. I know I will never forgive myself for this but it hardly makes a difference since I have lost you now and I guess forever!
Not complaining about anything Dad, but I am not a person who believes in destiny, God......
I know it was not to that extreme that you would not have made it and somewhere down the line I do believe that I am responsible for what has happened since I wasn't there and let you go through that hard time by yourself. I never thought that I am talking to you for the very last time that morning!!
I can't even imagine what you have been through during that time knowing that none of your kid is there with you. I see it every night, things your friends told me during your last times and I guess I will never forgive myself to leave you alone in that pain. I never had this realization that I will never see you again, Dad. There was a lot I wanted to share and wanted you to guide your son through his life but here I am, all alone, thinking about you every single day.
I kept moving in life thinking about a day we all will stay together. Dad, how to tell you, I see you with open eyes, still feel you are there at home and will hug you again someday while coming back home.
Initially it's Dadu, then You and it will be Me at some stage in life, I do not complaint about it but it wasn't the time Dad.It will keep hurting me entire life that you went through such a pain and I wasn't there for you. I know I will never forgive myself for this but it hardly makes a difference since I have lost you now and I guess forever!
